The Ambiguous Life

“They agreed that they were foreigners and nomads here on earth…They were looking for a better place, a heavenly homeland.” ~Heb. 11: 13, 16

Missionary Kids (MKs) and the broader genre of “Third Culture Kids” are often noted for their flexible, nomadic lifestyle. It is not necessarily a lifestyle that they have chosen for themselves but is certainly one that becomes woven into the fabric of their identity. As an MK I am not in the least bit ashamed to count myself as one of these global wanderers. This lifestyle does, however, pose certain dilemmas and comes with its fare share of fears and uncertainties. For example, my least favourite (and yes I spell it the British way) question is, “Where are you from?”
There are days I wish I had a good answer for that question, but the answer has simply become more complicated as I’ve grown older and taken jobs in countries that do not count as my residence.
Quite often I find myself longing for a place to call my own, and I am sure that at some point in my life that place might exist, but in those times of longing I am also reminded of Abraham and how God called him to wander and essentially go nowhere – which, by the way, also spells “now, here”. I am reminded that now and here I am called to live nowhere because my hope is set on a place, and more importantly a person, where all my longings will be filled.
It does not mean that the journey is easy or that because my hope is set on heaven I simply forget about what this world can offer. In fact, quite the opposite is true. I find myself struggling to be content with not knowing what tomorrow will hold; fighting the urge to just throw in the towel on this ambiguous lifestyle that I live for something more 9 to 5. Since my trip to the US a little over a month ago, I have frantically purchased relief items in the mayhem that is Kampala, Uganda, made one quick dash to Congo and back, been to meetings in Kenya and scheduled, rescheduled and rescheduled trips into Congo for various purposes. Hardly anything goes according to plan. I did not know until Sunday afternoon(today) if I would have a plane available for a trip into Congo Monday(tomorrow) morning that I had planned for over a month. The uncertainty of what each day might hold can be torturous at times. It can also be very joyous and exciting when I have surrendered my plans to the King.
Tomorrow I fly into Congo (at least that’s the plan) to try and meet with various partners and potential partners in our work there. I am more convinced than ever before that the battle ceased to be merely a physical one long ago, and that for reasons only the Kings knows, I have been thrown into this battle which at times seems like it will overwhelm the church and my feeble attempts to help it. And so I simply ask you to pray. Pray because we know that this battle is ours for the taking; the gates of Hell will not prevail over the Kingdom because the King has said so and his word is SURE. There is nothing ambiguous there. Pray for willing martyrs for the faith who will stand up as light in the darkness. We can no longer afford to be hidden, fearful disciples of a King who died for us when the darkness is so great and the world needs a “city on a hill” blazing out the hope, love and glory of the King. Pray for me that I will daily lay down the ambiguity and uncertainty that each day can bring and will revel in the surety of the presence of Jesus.
In my favourite children’s series, The Kingdom Chronicles, there is a part were the watchtowers of the Kingdom let out the call from tower to tower, “How goes the world??” and the answer comes back, “The world goes not well, but the Kingdom comes!” Yes indeed, the world is a messed up place, but thanks be to God, the Kingdom comes!