Gotta luv the hat.


Plastering a wall at the hospital.


Mixing Cement.


Fire near the compound.


This is a little disconcerting when your fences and roof is made of grass.

Walking Too Proud

When I was visiting my family in Uganda a little over a month ago I watched several movies with my sister Audrey. Among the movies we watched was The Four Feathers. It stars Heath Ledger and is about a young British officer who journeys to Sudan in an epic attempt to rescue his friends, who have gone there to advance the British Empire against the Muslim Mahdi insurgency. In recent weeks, there is one scene from the movie which has been frequently on my mind. In the scene the character played by Heath Ledger decides to hand himself over to the Mahdi in an attempt to rescue his friend. His Sudanese friend tries to dissuade him from the task and as he walks away comments, “You English walk too proudly on the earth”. Later, starving in prison and nearly dead, Ledger scoffs at himself and cries, “I’m not too proud now..I’m not too proud now.”
As I have gone about my work, the line, you English walk too proudly on the earth, has come back to me over and over. In western education we are ingrained with the ideology that the principles on which our cultures and nations are built are successful and thus also superior. We walk proudly on the earth because our forefathers spoke on behalf of freedom and equality. We take for granted the blessings we enjoy and are angered when we encounter hardship, thinking that somehow we do not deserve the pain and troubles faced by most of the world. We look at the wealth we have amassed, at the expense of poorer peoples and nations, and we believe that it entitles us to direct the actions of those people. We have the answers to the world’s problems and so much time, technology and resources to come up with more problems that we hire people to listen to them. We are proud, so proud.
Sudan is a humbling place. It is a nation turned upside down by countless wars and famines, but a nation proud in its own right. The answers here are not the same as the answers elsewhere. I came here determined to learn a thing or two; things about myself and things about Africa, but it did not take long before I was walking proudly on the black cotton soil that is prevalent here. I have ideas of how things should be done and how to go about doing them and like the well-educated American that I am I set out to do them my way. Walking proud does not last long here. The soil itself can swallow up that pride like it swallows up vehicles after the rains. My way has proved over and over again to be the wrong way. Men and women who have lived through war have insights, resilience, determination and a humbleness about life that is humbling at all levels. I have much to learn and I would like to say that I’m not too proud now, but I know that I have a lot humbling still in store for me – the ground may swallow me yet!
Life is a gift that is given to us by God. In the west we often think that it is a gift we are entitled to, but we are not. It is a gift and as such has not been earned and cannot be bought. Far too often I take for granted what I have been given and walk around proudly on this earth when God himself did not walk proudly on the earth, but humbly, dressed in our feeble flesh.
Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus. (Phil. 2:5)
“It is not great men who change the world, but weak men in the hand of a great God.”

The Fall

“Return to your rest, my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.” Ps. 116:7

I miss the Fall. There is a saying that African dust can not be washed from your feet – and its true. Africa sticks to you, and try as you might, you will never be able to remove the stains it leaves on your conscience, the smells it leaves lingering in your nostrils and the longing it leaves in your heart. Africa has certainly had that affect on me, but still, there are other places and experiences that have equally left an impression on me. The Fall – I really miss the Fall.
I haven’t experienced too many Falls(Autumns if you wish) in my life, but the few that I have really left me bedazzled. I like waking up one morning and looking out to find the world has changed from green to brilliant reds and oranges. I like watching those leaves fall to the ground until they form a fragile blanket that crunches under food and is ripe for kicking into the air – nature’s confetti. I, of course, like the natural beauty of Fall, but most of all I like the way that Fall makes change beautiful. Life is full of change and somehow Fall makes change worthwhile.
Fall makes me think of change in a different way. It is no longer some cruel uncertainty looming in the future but a beautiful progression from one stage of life to the next. Yes, I miss the Fall. For some reason, at Wake, the Fall always left me very pensive. In October I loved walking to Reynolda Gardens to smell the roses before they cut them back. (It is an experience I highly recommend for all those who have the chance to go there. The best smelling rose is called Secret and it lives it the back right corner of the garden.) I would sit on the nice wooden benches, watching gold fall from the sky and letting the garden’s sweet scents waft around me. And I would think about life and change and how it seems that so often in my life I close my eyes and wake up to find I am in a new place, with new friends, new cultures and new adventures waiting to be had. And I would think that all that beauty just made change worth it.
The seasons are changing here too, though it is much less spectacular. The rains have slowed to the occasional mid-afternoon thunderstorm and by 9am I have already taken a sweat bath, which isn’t hard – sitting at my computer will do the trick. There aren’t any trees here to turn golden red and the grass skipped the gold stage and went straight to brown. During the rains the grass grew six or seven feet tall and now people are hastily cutting it for their thatch roofs before it is set ablaze and the land turns to fire instead of mud. Change here is much harsher than in the US and I suppose that should be expected in a land where several million have died from war, famine and disease over the last two decades. Life is harsher, but the people meet it with a resilience and determination that is an inspiration and challenge to me. Peace in this country is precariously balanced in the hands of the powerful and still people go on with life, with their dreams and hopes for a better future for their children. A whole generation has grown up in refugee camps or the military and now they can only hope and pray that such a fate will not fall to their children.
Change is different here, as it is everywhere, and I miss the Fall. I miss the beauty that Fall makes of change and wish that in places like this change didn’t come in such harsh waves of transformation. But still the change is necessary and even here I am reminded that the Lord has been good me. That even here - especially here, among the poor, the meek, the war-weary – here my King walks the dusty streets of Africa and He has been good to me. And so as the change comes, I will rest in Him and let the longings I have be for Him more so than even the dust of Africa or the golden-red of a Fall evening.

Some fun with the camera

Back to Sunny Sudan

Well, I didn't really do so well at putting up a post from Uganda but here are some pics from my time there. I am back in Sudan again. Right now there are a lot of celebrations going on for Eid (the end of Ramadan). It is a celebration like Christmas, only a slightly different Sudanese version. The rains are slowing down and things are beginning to dry out and get hot. Hope you enjoy the pics.


My sister riding.


Our pets.


Going Fishing


Mom and I fishing.


Mom checking the bunk house in the islands.


Ooops!! No swimming??


Such a relaxing place!


Some of the guys on the island.


Dad eating sugarcane.


Unloading the boat.


Heading to the plane to come back.

Some of my coworkers on the way back to Sudan.